Letting go of Comparison

Cassandra Morrison
January 19, 2022
letting go of comparison girl holding balloons

When we get stuck in comparison, it can be so easy to look at other people around us and feel like they’re always a step ahead.

And if you’re here reading today, you probably know what I’m talking about. Sometimes, it can feel like everything is an endless race to the top and as if it’s everyone for themselves.

But maybe, just maybe, it doesn’t have to be.

*Disclaimer: All of the opinions and content presented in this post are not professional advice and are true to the best of the authors knowledge. This post is meant for inspirational and entertainment purposes only.*

Your journey is your journey

young girl sitting on stone wall overlooking landscape

The minute I started accepting that every person is on their own journey, the easier I found it was to start letting go of comparison.

I started realizing there’s no point in comparing myself to people who are on completely different paths than me, with different lives, different setbacks and different opportunities. So instead, I started finding motivation in focusing on the one thing I had that none of these other people did:

My life. My experience. My perspective.

We all get our moments to shine in our own ways, and we don’t want to miss them when they happen by being caught up in someone else’s. Once I started thinking like this, I stopped being so concerned with reaching a standard that wasn’t ever even meant for me, and I rewrote my own definition of success.

Be your best you

woman peace sign in front of blue wall

Of course we want to be good at whatever it is we do. And we can be if we keep working at it and going for what we want. But I discovered letting go of comparison had to come from letting go of the idea of what is “good” and “not good”. Because “good” and “success” are all subjective. Only I can really truly decide what is good for me, my situation and my life.

I have to build myself into the ideal version of me, and it’s never going to be the same as someone else. After all, no two things in life can be the same, because that doesn’t create growth of any kind. That creates sameness. And same = lame.

We don’t have to try to be extraordinary

girl in superhero costume looking out window

I’ve also found that comparison can be a result of perfectionism – wanting to be the best I can be all the time.

To stand out.

To be remembered.

And it’s true that there’s an incredible pressure in the world to stand out and be unique like all the famous stars around us – so much so that we try our hardest to do so.

But I’ve found that the only way to stand out is to do nothing at all.

To sit back and just let our own uniqueness come out in whatever way it wants. Because that’s the only thing that’s going to allow the space for all of your individual awesomeness to shine.

We all Have our Strengths

I believe we all have different strengths and weaknesses. And we all need different ones to compliment each other and make a well rounded-out world.

If every artist wanted to paint exactly like Picasso, then we’d have a lot of very confusing, colorful pieces of art that all look the same, and that would be the only art you would ever see.

Ever.

And, if you ask me, that’s pretty boring.

Comparison leads to a lack of individuality. We want different kinds of performers with different vocal qualities and their own unique strengths. We want to see you. Because you have something unique to teach us, something that no other person has. So please, please, please don’t ignore that thing.

We need it!

Use role models as fuel

friends helping each other climb rocks

We all need someone to look up to. But it becomes a problem when we start to over-compare ourselves to them. 

There’s always people that will be “better” than us at certain things. And that’s okay. In fact, that’s perfect. It means we always have something to be inspired by.

We can use their success in being the best version of themselves as motivation to help us achieve the same for ourselves. Not the same result, but the same feeling of passion and fulfillment.

Greatness comes from people lifting each other up, congratulating one another and being open to learning from one another’s success.

Nobody reaches their fullest potential alone.

Focus on growth.

plant growing from soil

If someone else has reached a level of skill we hope to achieve, I like to think that they are actually the ones missing out. Because we still have the excitement ahead of what it’s like to build that skill.

And if it’s something you’re extremely passionate about, imagine how amazing it’s going to be when you start to see your progress?

Growing any skill shouldn’t just be about the destination.

In fact, nothing should be – I don’t know about you, but I think the best part about life itself is the crazy, adventurous living part of it and not the whole dying part of it.

Reaching the top of the mountain is cool at first, but then, we just start to look for something higher to climb. I’d rather focus instead on the passion of doing something, the growth, the experiences along the way, and having fun. That way, it doesn’t matter if you reach that specific point you’ve set for yourself or not, you will have gained so much more than you could have ever imagined by simply focusing on the journey.

girl floating in box with balloons up into night sky

Letting go of comparison I think starts with being focused on finding your best self, over and over again as you grow and change. That’s the best part of life! You can always get better at something. And you will get to where you need to be when you are ready, as long as you work at it, and go in with an open mind that’s focused on your growth, rather than one that’s always focused on others.

In the end, we have been given our own lives to make the most of, and our own individuality to share with the rest of the world in a way that cannot ever be replicated.

Ever.

And, if you ask me, that’s pretty cool.

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